A German, A Pole, and Dumb Steve were all hiking in the Alps. They had reached the peak, had a nice picnic lunch, and were headed back down the narrow trail when a rockslide came thundering down the mountain. All three got safely out of the way, but were perturbed to find their only path was now blocked.
They were contemplating this predicament when all of a sudden, a blinding flash of light appeared. It slowly faded, and revealed the Good Fairy smiling gently at the hikers.
"I have come to grant you all one wish," she stated. "I will turn you into anything you desire - simply shout it out and I will make it so."
The hikers were shocked and stunned, but were truly grateful for the oppourtunity.
The German began running, and when he reached the edge of the cliff he leaped into the air and shouted, "An eagle!"
POOF! The German was turned into a majestic bald eagle, who soared away gracefully.
The Pole then jumped off of the edge of the cliff and bellowed, "A hawk!"
POOF! He was turned into a regal hawk, who flew elegantly toward the horizon.
Dumb Steve thought for a moment, then ran towards the edge of the cliff. Just before he reached the edge, he stumbled and said, "Crap!"